ALPHA v0.3

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33 Ways To Kill The Pillsbury Doughboy

Topic: adult

33 Ways to Kill the Pillsbury Doughboy

1. Run him through the Play Doh Fun Factory. 2. Convince him he's a Pop Tart. 3. Force him to eat yeast. 4. Tell him his wife is having an affair with a rolling pin. 5. Put him in a Taffy Twister. 6. Hypnotize him into believing that he's Stretch Armstrong. 7. Dip him in liquid nitrogen and drop him off the table. 8. Record his voice and play it back to him ten times louder. 9. Make him go bungee jumping with fishing line. 10. Convince him that the waffle iron is a tanning bed. 11. Put him in a rubber glove, tie it shut, and step on it. 12. Poke him in the belly...with an electric cattle prod. 13. Drop him in a deep fryer. 14. Soak him in alcohol and throw a match at him. 15. Bury him up to his neck and run over him with a steamroller. 16. Use him as a crash test dummy for a remote control car. 17. Put him in a bell jar and pump out the air. 18. Put him in a hamster ball and go bowling. 19. Send him to Smurf Village. They'll think he's a mutant and burn him. 20. Put him in a box and mail him to Somalia. 21. Mix him with Silly Putty and bounce him into traffic. 22. O.D. him on Vivarin until he laughs so hard he explodes. 23. Fire him out of a cannon into a brick wall or strainer. 24. Mix him with concrete and throw him in the river. 25. Execute him in a food processor. 26. Strap him to the bottom of an elevator. 27. Glue him to an escalator. 28. Stuff him in a beer can and send it to the recycling center. 29. Knead him into C-4 and put a firecracker in his mouth. 30. Throw him into a jet engine's air intake. 31. Pour honey on him and tie him to an anthill. 32. Make him slide down a cheese grater. 33. Force him through a syringe.

ALPHA v0.3