ALPHA v0.3

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15 Ways To Tell If Your Marriage Is In Trouble

Topic: adult

15 ways to tell if your marriage is in trouble:

1. When your wife packs a condom in your lunch bag.

2. When your wife says, "We had sex last month, Pervert!"

3. When you hear, "Oh Bill, hurt me, baby!" and your name is Dave.

4. When your wife's closest girl friend rides a Harlie and subscribes to "Succulent Kitten" Magazine.

5. When your toy poodle starts to growl everytime you hug your wife.

6. When your Pit Bull stops barking at the mailman.

7. When you call for the phone company and the repairman skids to a stop in front of your house 3 minutes later.

8. When the pizza man shows up with a hard on.

9. When the gardener demands to know what you're doing home on a Tuesday.

10. When your kids starts calling the butcher uncle Wolfgang.

11. When your wife's "back massager" feels like real skin, and has protruding veins on it.

12. When your wife tries to explain away her frequent headaches by telling you it's brain cancer.

13. When you wake up to find your wife standing over you with a pair of heavy-duty hedge clippers.

14. When you're invited to attend "What a bummer!" day on the Rickie Lake Show.

15. When your kid invites the milkman to school for show and tell.

ALPHA v0.3