ALPHA v0.3

Because of the fun and sarcastic nature of some of these jokes, viewer & reader discretion is advised. Don't read'em and then complain!

This is an alpha release of this section. If you find any problems or would like to recommend something, please be kind enough to give us some feedback.


What Women Really Mean

Topic: men-women


She says =>> English

You want =>> You want

We need =>> I want

It's your decision =>> The correct decision should be obvious by now

Do what you want =>> You'll pay for this later

We need to talk =>> I need to complain

Sure...go ahead =>> I don't want you to

I'm not upset =>> Of course I'm upset, you moron

You' manly =>> You need a shave and you sweat a lot

You're certainly attentive tonight. =>> Is sex all you ever think about?

I'm not emotional! And I'm not overreacting! =>> I'm on my period

Be romantic, turn out the lights. =>> I have flabby thighs

This kitchen is so inconvenient. =>> I want a new house

I want new curtains =>> and carpeting, furniture, wallpaper...

Hang the picture there =>> No, I mean hang it there!

I heard a noise =>> I noticed you were almost asleep

Do you love me? =>> I'm going to ask for something expensive

How much do you love me? =>> I did something today you're really not going to like

I'll be ready in a minute. =>> Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V.

Is my butt fat? =>> Tell me I'm beautiful

You have to learn to communicate. =>> Just agree with me

Are you listening to me!? =>> [Too late, your dead.]

Yes =>> No

No =>> No

Maybe =>> No

I'm sorry. =>> You'll be sorry

Do you like this recipe? =>> It's easy to fix, so you'd better get used to it.

I'm not yelling! =>> Yes I am yelling because I think this is important

In answer to the question "What's wrong?"

The same old thing. =>> Nothing. Nothing. =>> Everything. Everything. =>> My PMS is acting up. Nothing, really. =>> It's just that you're such an asshole. I don't want to talk about it. =>> Go away, I'm still building up evidence against you.

ALPHA v0.3