ALPHA v0.3

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Statue To Clinton

Topic: politics


Dear Friend,

We have the distinguished honor of being the committee for raising five million dollars for placing a statue of Bill Clinton in the Hall of Fame of Washington, D.C.

This committee was in a quandary as to where to put the statue. It was not wise to put it beside the statue of George Washington, who never told a lie, nor beside Jesse Jackson, who never told the truth since Bill Clinton could never tell the difference.

We finally decided to place it beside Christopher Columbus, the greatest Democrat of them all. He left not knowing where he was going, did not know where he was, he returned not knowing where he had been, and did it all on borrowed money.

Moses said to the children of Israel, "Pick up your shovels, mount your asses and camels, and I will lead you to the promised land." Nearly 5,000 years later, Franklin D. Roosevelt said, "Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses, and light up a Camel, this is the promised land." Now Bill Clinton is going to steal your shovels, kick your asses, raise the price of Camels, and mortgage the promised land.

If you are one of the fortunate people who have anything left after paying taxes, we expect a generous contribution to this worthwhile cause.


ALPHA v0.3