ALPHA v0.3

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Dictionary Of True Hackers --------------------------

Topic: programming

Dictionary of True Hackers --------------------------

Address ; talk about

Announce ; At announce time, a product is assigned a number instead of a name, with the result that not even the developers know what it is anymore...

APL bigot ; same thing as any other <language> bigot

Attrition ; GAFIAtion

Bad Information ; lies

Bean Counter ; pedantic materialist

Bells and Whistles ; Frills added to a program or machine, to make it more exciting without making it much better BiCapitalization Russian abbreviation (e g VisiCalc)

Big Blue ; Data Processing Division of IBM

Big Blue Zoo ; The Rochester lab, Minnesota

Big Red Switch ; The PC Power On/Off button

Binary Aboriginal ; A "Real Programmer" in the extreme

Bit-bucket ; "Black Hole"

Blem ; Any bug or problem (cf 'blBlue Glue SNA (Systems Network Architecture)

Blue Sky ; An idea not inhibited by the practical, possible, political or popular trends

Blue Suiter ; Someone professionally wearing a tie, notably an IBM marketing representative

Blue Wire ; Hardware fix

Boa ; The big fat cables lurking under the floor of any large computer installa- tion. It is rumoured that System/370 channel cables are limited to 200 ft because beyond that length the Boas get dangerous...

Boondoggle ; Conference with a large admixture of pleasure with business

Branch to Fishkill ; Any unexpected jump in a program which produces catastrophic or just plain weird results

Breakage ; The extra people that must be added to an organisation because the Plan has changed

Bridge ; Unsubstantiated facts used to explain one set of data in terms of another

Bubblegum ; The B|blingen lab, Germany

Bullet ; One of a list of items to be emphasized (from the item sign against it)

Burn ; Make a copy

BWQ ; Buzz Word Quotient

Candy-Striped ; Highest security class

Casters Up Mode ; A totally unusable state (of hardware)

Diff ; Make a list of changes ( like Filecom)

Easter Egging ; Replacing unrelated parts and hoping the malfunction goes away

Earthquake ; Real life shock test for computer equip- ment. Contrary to popular belief, recent earthquakes near California plants were not initiated by IBM as part of the Quality testing program.

End User ; A hypothetical non-IBM person, probably of IQ < 80 ('room-temperature IQ') who is expected to represent the biggest group of users of IBM equipment in the future

Enhancement ; A fix for a problem that has been reported too often to be ignored

Europe ; That part of the (IBM) world that consists of Israel, South Africa and the European countries

Exciting ; The lowest interest ranking for speeches and papers delivered at internal meetings, the complete sequence being: exciting, interesting, mind-boggling, and IBM Registered Confidential

Fall Over ; ABEND, crash

Fat, Dumb and Happy ; Typically used of a project's manage- ment who think their project is com- petitive when it's not

FBC ; Funny Black Connector

The hermaphrodite ; connector used in the cabling system

Footprint ; 1.The floor space taken up by some piece of computer equipment. 2.The audit trail left by a program so that a recovery pro- gram(mer) can determine the areas of storage that the first program stepped upon.

Glass ; Silicon chips

Green Lightning ; Apparently randomly flashing streaks on the face of the 3278-9 terminals while a programmable symbol set is being loaded. This hardware bug was not fixed, as some bright spark suggested that this 'would let the user know that something is happening'. It certainly does.

Hot-Key ; Keystroke (or combination thereof) that switches environments.

IBMois ; Strange French dialect.

Ibmox ; To copy xerographically.

I didn't change anything ; Plaintive cry preceding feelings of the cold pricklies. The proper reply is: 'Then it works just the same as it did before, right?'

Incent ; To motivate with the carrot.

Ironmonger ; Hardware specialist (derog)

Kahuna ; (orig: Hawaiian witch doctor) guru, wizard

KISS principle ; 'Keep It Simple, Stupid'

Lightning Bolt 505 ; Error msg for systems crash (cf 'Shazam')

Lion Food ; Middle management or hq staff.

Origin: ; the old joke that goes something like this: Two lions escape from a zoo and split up to improve their chances, after agreeing to meet after two months. When they do meet, one is skinny and the other over- weight. Thin one: 'How did you manage? I ate a person once, and they came searching the whole country for me. Since then, I've had to eat mice, insects, even grass.' Fat one: 'Well, I hid near an IBM office and preyed a manager a day. And they never noticed.'

LSD ; Improper behavior on business premises (Liquor, Sex, and Drugs)

Lunatic Fringe ; Customers who will always take Release 1 of any new product.

Open Kimono ; Reveal everything

Open Switch ; An unresolved issue

Play Pen ; Room where programmers work

Pokieland ; The Poughkeepsie area

Programming ; The art of debugging a blank sheet of paper

Rococo ; See Bells & Whistles

ROJ ; Retired On the Job. Someone just marking time instead of doing his job

Sandbender ; Person involved with silicon lithography and the physical design of chips.

Seven Dwarves ; Nowadays only 6 at most. Burroughs,

Honey- ; well, NCR, Univac, CDC and DEC

Splat ; '*'

Susie Cobol ; A programmer straight out of training school who knows everything except the benefits of comments in plain English. Also (fashionable among personkind these days to avoid accusations of sexism)

The Silent Majority ; End Users with an IQ < 70

Tinstaafl ; There Is No Such Thing As A Free Lunch

Tip of the ice cube ; The visible part of something very small and insignificant.

Tired Iron ; DP equipment that is perfectly functional but has been superseded by a new line of devices.

Token Ring ; A local area net work architecture. 'One Ring to Rule Them All, One Ring to Find Them, One Ring to Bring Them All And in the Darkness Bind Them, in a LAN with more nodes where the stations lie'.

Toy ; A computer program that can be understood

Trailing Edge ; Slow to change

Trivial ; Possible

TCB ; Trouble Came Back. Intermittent or difficult-to-reproduce problem which has failed to respond to neglect.

Tuesday ; The Day of the Announcement.

Tyranosaure ; REXX, when used in France.

User-cuddly ; Extremely friendly software or documentation

Verbiage ; Documentation

Warm Fuzzies ; Opposite of Cold Pricklies

Yellow Wire ; Hardware fix

Zipperhead ; One who has a closed mind (said to be most frequently used in Development Labs).

80-column mind ; Usually of people to whom the transition from card to tape was a traumatic experience (nobody has dared tell them about disks yet) It is said that these people will be buried '9-EDGE-FORWARD- FACE-DOWN'.

ALPHA v0.3