ALPHA v0.3

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Why God Never Received Tenure At Any University

Topic: religion


1. He had only one major publication.

2. It was in Hebrew.

3. It had no references.

4. It wasn't published in a refereed journal.

5. Some even doubt that he wrote it himself.

6. It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since?

7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited.

8. He never applied to the Ethics Board for permission to use human subjects.

9. The scientific community has had a hard time duplicating his results.

10. When one experiment went awry, he tried to cover it up by drowning the subjects.

11. He rarely came to class, just told his students to read the book.

12. Some say he had his son teach the class.

13. He expelled his first two students for learning.

14. Although there were only ten requirements, most students failed his test.

15. His office hours were infrequent, and usually held on a mountaintop.

ALPHA v0.3