ALPHA v0.3

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Mr. And Mrs. Griswold Had A Young Son Whom They Named Spoilage

Topic: g-rated

Mr. and Mrs. Griswold had a young son whom they named Spoilage. And a fine one it was! Except for one problem, Spoilage was addicted to Hostess King Dons. He ate them for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

By the time Spoilage was ready to enter Kindergarten, it was clear that he was well behind his peers in the area of intelligence. He could not count or read. He could not understand simple commands, such as "Please change the TV to Channel 48!" All that Spoilage could do was sit in the corner and drool while devouring a Hostess King Don.

The Griswolds took Spoilage to Dr. Grover to ask what had caused their son to be such a total waste. The doctor replied, "It must be all of those King Dons that he eats." So the Griswolds sued the Hostess people for $10 million in damages.

On the opening day of the trial, the attorney for Hostess asked the judge to dismiss the case on the grounds that the Griswolds had been warned by the product's label and thus Hostess could not be held liable.

The Griswolds' attorney responded, "That's ridiculous! There's no warning label on boxes of King Dons!"

The Hostess attorney replied, "Oh yes there is! It's right here where the ingredients are listed, 'Contains sorbic acid to retard Spoilage.'"

ALPHA v0.3